See

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Appendix C: Index

From Volume 1: See

Appendix C: Index

Quick Reference to Key Concepts and Terms

This index provides quick access to the major concepts, tactics, and tools discussed throughout this book. Three references are published online rather than in this book and are marked (online): Core Techniques, the Advanced Cards and the Specialty Cards. Entries point to chapters rather than page numbers, so they stay accurate across print, ebook and any later reprint.

Numbers

3-3-3 Orienting Scan, (3 sights, 3 sounds, 3 movements), Chapter 16 and Core Techniques (online)

The 3, (3 seconds, 3 breaths, 3 words), front matter of The Narcissism Decoder and Core Techniques (online)

  • Not the same tool as the 3-3-3 Orienting Scan, Chapter 16 and Core Techniques (online)

69 Patterns of Manipulation, See Start Here (Card 0), Chapter 3 (Cards 1-27), and Chapter 4 for the index to the rest (online)

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, the crisis resources page online

A

Abuse Amnesia, Chapter 5 and Appendix A

  • Definition, Appendix A
  • In trauma bonds, Chapter 5 and Appendix B

Acute Explosion, Appendix A

  • See also Cycle of Violence; Trauma Bonds

Ambient Abuse, Appendix A

  • Examples, throughout
  • Recognition, throughout

Attachment Style, Appendix A

  • Anxious-preoccupied, Appendix A
  • Dismissive-avoidant, Appendix A
  • Fearful-avoidant, Appendix A
  • Secure, Appendix A

B

Baiting, Appendix A and Core Techniques (online)

  • Recognition, throughout
  • Responses, throughout

Blame-Shifting, Chapters 6, 13 and Appendix A

  • In family systems, Chapter 8
  • In romantic relationships, Chapter 13

Borderline Personality Disorder, Chapter 6 and Appendix A

  • Distinguished from narcissism, Chapter 6
  • Readers who hold a diagnosis, Chapter 6

Boundaries, throughout

  • Setting boundaries, Chapters 2, 9, 12
  • Narcissistic reactions to, Chapter 16
  • Scripts for maintaining, Chapter 16

Breadcrumbing, Chapter 3 and Appendix A

C

Cerebral Narcissist, Chapter 6 and Appendix A

Childhood Patterns, See Chapter 11

  • Breaking the pattern, Chapter 11
  • Recognition, throughout

Circular Conversation, Appendix A

Cisgender, Appendix A

Closure, (denial of), Appendix A

Coercive Control, Chapter 13 and Appendix A and Appendix B

Cognitive Dissonance, Chapters 5, 15 and Appendix A

  • In trauma bonds, Chapter 5 and Appendix B

Communal Narcissist, Chapters 6, 7 and Appendix A

Compartmentalization, Appendix A

Complex PTSD (C-PTSD), Appendix A

  • Recovery from, Chapter 17 and Appendix B
  • Symptoms, Chapter 6 and Appendix A

Conditioning, Chapters 9, 11, 12

  • Childhood conditioning, Chapter 11

Covert Narcissist, Chapters 6, 9 and Appendix A

  • Also called vulnerable narcissist, Appendix A
  • Characteristics, Appendix A
  • Versus grandiose narcissist, Chapter 6

Cycle of Violence, Appendix A and Appendix B

  • Tension building, Chapter 5 and Appendix A and Appendix B
  • Acute explosion, Appendix A
  • Honeymoon / reconciliation, Chapter 5 and Appendix A

D

DARVO, (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender), Chapters 3, 18 and Appendix A

  • Recognition, throughout
  • Responses, throughout

Deadnaming, Appendix A

  • Identity as leverage, Chapter 13
  • Weaponized versus accidental, Appendix A

Decoder Cards, See Start Here (Card 0) in The Narcissism Decoder, Chapter 3, and the Advanced and Specialty Cards (online)

  • Master card (Card 0, the Wolf Test), Start Here in The Narcissism Decoder
  • Core patterns (Cards 1–27)
  • Advanced patterns (Cards 28–54), published online
  • Digital patterns (Cards D-1 to D-4), the Specialty Cards (online)
  • Professional patterns (Cards P-1 to P-4), the Specialty Cards (online)
  • Substance-Related patterns (Cards S-1 to S-4), the Specialty Cards (online)
  • Framework patterns (Cards F-1 to F-2), the Specialty Cards (online)
  • Decoder Protocol (Chapter 16)
  • How to use, Chapters 1, 16 and Core Techniques (online)

Devalue, (phase), Appendix A

  • In abuse cycle, Chapter 5
  • Recognition, throughout

Discard, (phase), Appendix A

  • Coping with, Appendix B
  • Pattern, throughout

Dissociation, Chapters 2, 5, 11

  • Grounding techniques, Chapters 16, 17 and Core Techniques (online)
  • Recognition, throughout

Double Bind, Appendix A

  • Examples, throughout

Drama Triangle, Chapter 5 and Appendix A

  • Persecutor, Chapter 5 and Appendix A
  • Rescuer, Chapter 5 and Appendix A
  • Victim, Chapter 5
  • Rescue Return (Card 53)

Duluth Model, Appendix A

  • Power and Control Wheel, Appendix A
  • Versus the cycle of violence, Appendix A

E

Emergency Services, If You Are in Danger Right Now (front matter), Chapters 3, 13, 18

Emotional Flashbacks, Appendix A and Appendix B

Emotional Incest, (Covert Incest), Appendix A

  • In family systems, Appendix A
  • See also Spousification

Empathy, (lack of)

  • Affective and cognitive, Chapter 6 and Appendix A

Enabler, Chapters 8, 10, 12 and Appendix A

  • In family systems, Chapters 8, 12
  • Recognition, throughout

Energetic Remapping, See Chapter 17

  • Exercises, Chapter 17 and Appendix B

Energetic Signature, Chapter 2

  • Body awareness, Chapters 2, 5, 16

Enmeshment, Chapters 6, 9, 14

  • In family systems, Chapters 9, 10
  • Recovery from, Chapter 18 and Appendix B

Exposure Questions, See Chapter 15

F

False Reveal, Chapter 4 and Appendix A

False Self, Chapter 6 and Appendix A and Appendix B

Family Systems, Chapter 12 and Appendix B

  • Breaking free (Chapter 12)
  • Roles and triangulation (Chapter 8)
  • Individual roles, Appendix A

Father Wound, See Chapter 10

FLEAS, (maladaptive behaviors), Appendix A

Flying Monkeys, Chapters 4, 8 and Appendix A

  • Dealing with, Chapters 4, 18 and Appendix B
  • Recognition, throughout

FOG, (Fear, Obligation, Guilt), Appendix A

  • Breaking free from, Appendix A
  • Recognition, throughout

Future Faking, Chapter 4 and Appendix A

  • During love bombing, Appendix A
  • Recognition, throughout

G

Gaslighting, Chapters 1, 3, 11

  • Counter-strategies, Chapter 16
  • Recognition, throughout
  • Types, Chapters 3, 4

Gender-Affirming Care, Appendix A

  • As a control point, Appendix A
  • Identity as leverage, Chapter 13
  • See also Medical Gatekeeping

Golden Child, Chapters 8, 9, 12

Grandiose Narcissist, Chapters 6, 7 and Appendix A

  • Characteristics, Appendix A
  • Formerly called overt narcissist, Appendix A
  • Versus covert narcissist, Chapter 6

Grandiosity, Chapters 6, 15 and Appendix A

Gray Rock Method, Chapter 17 and Appendix A and Core Techniques (online)

Grooming, Appendix A

  • Recognition, throughout
  • Stages, Chapter 13 and Appendix B

H

Hero / Parentified Child, Chapter 8 and Appendix A

Histrionic Narcissist, Chapter 6 and Appendix A

Hoovering, Chapters 4, 13 and Appendix A

  • After discard, Chapter 13
  • Resistance strategies, Chapter 16
  • The variant that asks for nothing, Chapter 13
  • Types, Chapters 4, 13

HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy), Appendix A

  • Control of supply as leverage, Appendix A
  • Identity as leverage, Chapter 13

Hypervigilance, Chapters 2, 9, 17

  • In recovery, Appendix A
  • Symptoms, Chapters 2, 5, 17

I

Idealization, (phase), Appendix A

  • In abuse cycle, Chapter 5
  • Love bombing, throughout

Identified Patient, Chapter 10 and Appendix A

Identity as Leverage, See Chapter 13

  • Outing as threat, Chapter 13
  • Identity invalidation, Chapter 13
  • Community isolation, Chapter 13

Intermittent Reinforcement, Chapters 5, 9, 13

  • In trauma bonds, Chapter 5 and Appendix B
  • Psychology of, Chapter 5

Invalidation, Chapters 3, 13 and Appendix A

  • Effects, Chapters 4, 6 and Appendix B
  • Recovery from, Chapter 17 and Appendix B

J

JADE, (Justify, Argue, Defend, Explain), Appendix A

  • Avoiding, Appendix A

L

Limerence, Appendix A

  • Versus love, Appendix A

Lost Child / Invisible Child, Chapters 8, 12 and Appendix A

Love Bombing, throughout

  • During idealization, Chapter 5
  • Recognition, throughout
  • Versus genuine affection, Chapter 3

Low Contact, Chapter 12 and Appendix A

M

Magician Tactics, Chapter 4 and Appendix A

  • See also False Reveal

Malignant Narcissist, Chapter 6 and Appendix A

  • Safety first, Chapter 6

Manipulation, throughout

  • Across contexts (Chapter 14)
  • In romantic relationships (Chapter 13)
  • Tactics (Chapters 3 and 4)

Mascot / Entertainer, Chapters 8, 12 and Appendix A

Masking, Appendix A and Appendix B

Medical Gatekeeping, Appendix A

  • Identity as leverage, Chapter 13
  • See also Gender-Affirming Care

Mirroring, Chapters 6, 13 and Appendix A

  • During love bombing, Appendix A
  • Recognition, throughout

Misgendering, Appendix A

  • Identity as leverage, Chapter 13
  • Weaponized versus accidental, Appendix A

Mother Wound, See Chapter 9

Moving Goalposts, Chapters 3, 4, 14

Mutual Abuse, Appendix A

  • See also Reactive Abuse

N

Narcissistic Archetypes, See Chapter 6

  • Cerebral narcissist, Chapter 6 and Appendix A
  • Communal narcissist, Chapters 6, 7 and Appendix A
  • Covert (vulnerable) narcissist, Chapters 6, 9 and Appendix A
  • Grandiose (overt) narcissist, Chapters 6, 7 and Appendix A
  • Histrionic narcissist, Chapter 6 and Appendix A
  • Malignant narcissist, Chapter 6 and Appendix A
  • Somatic narcissist, Chapter 6 and Appendix A

Narcissistic Collapse, Appendix A

Narcissistic Injury, Chapters 6, 18 and Appendix A

  • Rage responses, Chapter 15
  • Triggers, Chapters 6, 18

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), Chapter 6 and Appendix A

Narcissistic Rage, Chapters 6, 15 and Appendix A

  • Explosive, Chapters 6, 15
  • Passive-aggressive, Chapter 6

Narcissistic Supply, Chapters 6, 7, 18 and Appendix A

  • Types, Appendix A

Nervous System, throughout

  • Energetic remapping, Chapters 1, 5, 17
  • Regulation tools, Chapter 17
  • Trauma responses, Chapter 5

No Contact, Chapters 5, 12, 13

  • When not possible, Chapter 12

O

Object Constancy, (lack of), Appendix A

Overt Narcissist, See Grandiose Narcissist

P

Parental Wounds, See Chapters 9-10

Parentification, Chapter 9 and Appendix A

  • Effects, Chapters 9, 11 and Appendix B
  • In childhood, Chapters 8, 9, 10

Peacekeeper, Chapters 8, 11

Persecutor, Chapters 5, 13 and Appendix A

  • See also Drama Triangle; Rescuer

Power and Control Wheel, Appendix A

Professional Boundary Patterns, See Cards P-1 to P-4, the Specialty Cards (online)

  • Territorial Hovering, Card P-1
  • Ownership Entitlement, Card P-2
  • Collaborative Threat Response, Card P-3
  • Reaction Flip / DARVO, Card P-4

Projection, Chapters 3, 8, 15

  • Examples, throughout
  • Recognition, throughout

Protective Self, Appendix A

Proxy Recruitment, Appendix A

  • See also Flying Monkeys

R

Radical Acceptance, Appendix A

Reactive Abuse, Chapter 5 and Appendix A

  • Prevention, Chapters 5, 18
  • Recognition, throughout

Reality Testing, Chapter 15 and Appendix A

Recovery Tools, See Chapter 17

Reparenting, Chapter 11 and Appendix A

Reproductive Coercion, Chapter 13 and Appendix A

  • Pregnancy as entrapment, Chapter 13

Rescue Return, (Card 53)

  • See also Drama Triangle; Rescuer

Rescuer, Chapter 5 and Appendix A

  • Heart or ego test, Chapter 5
  • Versus helping, Chapter 5 and Appendix A
  • See also Drama Triangle; Persecutor

Responses, Practical, See Chapter 16

  • Scripts, throughout
  • Strategies, Chapter 16 and Appendix B

Rumination, Chapter 17 and Appendix A and Core Techniques (online)

  • Breaking the rumination cycle, Chapter 17

S

Scapegoat, Chapters 1, 8, 10, 12

  • Recovery, throughout

Scripts, See Chapter 16

Silent Treatment, Chapters 8, 13 and Appendix A

  • Responses, throughout

Smear Campaign, Chapters 6, 13, 14

  • Coping with, Appendix B
  • Recognition, throughout

Somatic Narcissist, Chapter 6 and Appendix A

Splitting, Chapter 15 and Appendix A

Spousification, Appendix A

  • See also Parentification; Emotional Incest

Stonewalling, Appendix A

Strangulation, When the Pattern Becomes Physical, and Appendix A and Appendix B

  • Medical assessment, When the Pattern Becomes Physical
  • In romantic relationships, Chapter 13

Supply, See Narcissistic Supply

T

Toxic Shame, Chapter 17 and Appendix A and Appendix B

  • Healing from, Chapter 17 and Appendix B

Transition, Appendix A

  • Identity as leverage, Chapter 13
  • Timeline as a control point, Appendix A

Trauma Bonds, See Chapter 5 and Appendix A

  • Breaking, throughout
  • Formation, throughout
  • Psychology of, Chapter 5

Triangulation, throughout

  • In families, Chapters 7, 8 and Appendix A
  • In romantic relationships, Chapter 13
  • Recognition, throughout

Triggers, Chapters 6, 9, 13

  • Identifying, Chapters 7, 12 and Appendix B
  • Managing, throughout

Trophy on the Shelf, (Card 54)

V

Validation, throughout

Victim Stance, Appendix A

  • DARVO, Chapter 3, Appendix A (definition), Appendix B (Freyd) and the Specialty Cards (online), Card P-4
  • Recognition, throughout

Vulnerability Hangover, Appendix A

W

When the Pattern Becomes Physical, printed after the first chapter

Word Salad, Chapter 15 and Appendix A

  • Recognition, throughout
  • Responses, throughout

Using This Index

This index is designed for quick reference when you need to:

  1. Locate a specific concept you've heard about but want to understand more deeply
  2. Find practical tools for a situation you're currently facing
  3. Cross-reference related topics to build comprehensive understanding
  4. Review key concepts as part of your healing journey

Entries point to chapters rather than page numbers, so they stay accurate across print, ebook and any later reprint.

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